The Adventures, Mishaps and Musings of Me

So tomorrow, I'm flying home to England for a few days before the July exams.  Amongst the many things on the family itenery, we're going to London to see "Waiting for Godot" with Ian McKellen and Patrick Stewart.  *Fangirlish excitement*

It's about time I flee to England, because something very strange is currently taking place within Italy.  Something strange that I first noticed on the weekly shopping trip a few weeks ago: There were blond people in the supermarket.  Not just one blond person (that would be disconcerting enough) but many of them, in the pasta aisle, confusedly weighing fruit and clogging up the cheese counter.

"Very strange", I thought to myself as I waded my way through the masses.  More strange was that all the blond people carried a degree of sunburn, as if they had too much time on their hands to lay about in the sun.  At first I thought blond hair dye must have suddenly become Milan fashion and sun tan lotion out of fashion, but then, as I found myself in the queue for the checkout surrounded by non-Italian speakers, the dramatic and frightning truth hit me - They were all on holiday.

Days passed.  The situation worsened.

Milan is covered with tourists.

Now, don't get me wrong, I don't mind foriegners coming into my Italia.  But... seriously... why do tourists have to walk so friggin' slow?!  Have they never seen architecture before?  Have they never seen ice cream before?  Must they always, dawdle, point and exclaim loudly to their family at every single thing that comes into their field of view?!?  Because, you know, some of us actually live here; some of us have things we need to do; some of us are late for the things we need to do and thus cannot be doing with your touristic-pavement-congesting-photo-taking-snail-speed-happy-go-lucky antics!

...

Honestly, I thought this was the exact reason they had MacDonald's in Milan: To divert the tourists off the streets so that the rest of us can actually get on with our lives.  Bloody foriegners.